Welcome to my blog, I've been debating wether or not I should actually do this.. but here it is. I've always wanted to "blog" (and no not tumblr blogging, because I do that already), but I've never been sure of what I would say or how I would say it. Everybody has to start somewhere..
The past year was very difficult for me, and as of now.. I can't say my problems have completely vanished. I mean it's pretty hard when you struggle with an eating disorder. Although, it's safe for me to say that every up and down I've experienced during that time taught me something valuable about myself. Every time I find myself in a battle with my disorder gives me more clues about myself and who I am. There is something I can say this with a lot of confidence.. and that is I am one stubborn motherf*cker. I like to think that I'm right about everything, it takes a hell lot of convincing to make me think otherwise. I guess I could also say that I have an obsession with being or at least trying to be perfect. I was never the prettiest, or the fittest, the smartest.. blah blah, but I so desperately wanted to be.
I can say that my outlook and attitude on being and looking "perfect" has changed in the past two years.. it's pretty sad that I had to get sick before this happened, but I've learned a lot from my struggles. But now it's different, I'm different. My main goal is to be HAPPPPYYYYY and of course healthy.. I guess you can say I'm inspired, by many things.. mostly by the people that I love. Their constant gestures, words and actions of affection and care towards me lets me know that they love me back.. and hey, if these special few can love me.. There must be something that is right or good enough about me.
